7 Reasons to Start Focusing on Your Relationship With Yourself

JT - It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are

A couple of weeks ago, I was triggered again around my own worthiness as a human being and who I am. It was an interesting situation as I didn’t expect it.

Fortunately, I have tools now in my toolkit for these types of situations. I didn’t react angrily to what happened, I stayed present by breathing and sensing what was happening inside my body. When I got home, I spent time reflecting on what happened (i.e. what I was thinking, how I felt, what were the facts? etc.) and learning from it. I also spoke to a friend/mentor about what happened (whom I trust).

This way of coping is very different from what I did in the past. In the past, I would have pretended the situation didn’t happen, buried my emotions in food, tennis, work, study etc. as I didn’t trust myself enough to feel my emotions or realise I mattered.

This experience has shown me how much I have grown in the past few years and makes me realise how grateful I am for the experiences in my life that helped me focus more on my relationship with myself.

Following are 7 reasons why I am glad I started to focus on my relationship with myself.

7 Reasons to Focus on Your Relationship With Yourself

1. We Cannot Change What We Refuse to Confront –

Yes I know it takes courage to change. Some days I wished it was easier, however I realised that my experience was another lesson I needed to learn so I kept on showing up. I chose to pay attention to my relationship with money and gently lean in to the uncomfortableness. Yes, it was painful and challenging, however I got through it and if I didn’t have this experience I wouldn’t trust myself as I do today.

“We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.”

~ Albert Einstein

2. Clarity –

If I didn’t choose to look at my relationship with myself (i.e. the beliefs, values, stories etc.), I wouldn’t have the clarity around myself. I now feel connected to myself, gave greater self-awareness and self-knowledge life, have better relationships with my family and friends and am more compassionate and confident in my own abilities.

“Clarity is the most important thing. I can compare clarity to pruning in gardening. You know, you need to be clear. If you are not clear, nothing is going to happen. You have to be clear. Then you have to be confident about your vision. And after that, you just have to put a lot of work in.”

~ Diane von Furstenberg

3. Ignorance is Not Bliss –

Exhaustion, stress and burnout do not equate to personal effectiveness or good results for anyone.

“Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”

~ Martin Luther King Jr.

4. Increased Self-Worth –

I believe it is important for every person to develop a better relationship with themselves, so they can take care of themselves as we are all worthy of love and belonging.

“Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy – the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.” 

~ Brené Brown

5. The Best Time Is NOW –

Yes the best time to start my journey, to forgive myself and to pay attention to my relationship with money is NOW, not tomorrow or when I am in a relationship – I am already complete and whole (I just had to unlearn some beliefs and behaviours). And the only time to do that is NOW –

“With the past, I have nothing to do; nor with the future. I live now.”

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson.

6. There is Enough for Everyone –

Before I started to investigate my relationship with many areas of my life (e.g. money), I didn’t think there was enough. Subconsciously, I was running on old programming and seeing money as a competition, just like the game of tennis. What I’ve realised is there is enough for everyone – just like oxygen there is enough money to go around and allowing ourselves to be all that we are, helps other people step up and shine their own light.

“Your own Self-Realization is the greatest service you can render the world.”

~ Ramana Maharshi.

7. DENIAL Wasn’t Working –

Occasionally, I used to think DENIAL might work, however it didn’t. I had to be honest with myself and not live in DENIAL (Don’t Even Notice I Am Lying) any longer. I realised

“The truth will set you free.”

~ Unknown.


Over to You –

Are there any other reasons, why it is important to start looking at relationship with yourself? If so, feel free to share them below! And remember –

“To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.”

~ E.E. Cummings

Feel free to share any comments below and if you are ready to reclaim your courage and take the next step towards opening your heart, why not join our Toolkit?

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